One Line

From Tyler Zahnke

"One Line" is the name of my ninth comedy bit. It was written in early April of 2011. It is a parody of Imogen Heap's song "Lifeline". The lyrics are about the BrailleNote mPower, a computer for the blind with audio and refreshable Braille output.

Lyrics

No one's with me. Mmmmmm, I am reading my display. I have gigabytes of memory. Mmmmmm, I have USB flash drives Mmmmmm, In a zipper pouch that's on the casing. I read ebooks, And listen to songs. Clicking and typing, And reading and writing, And listening, and doing my work. One line of eight-dot Braille cells, In a contraption made by HumanWare (HumanWare). There is a touch cursor key For every cell in the Braille display. Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, Keep reading. Keep reading. I write programs Using languages like JavaScript. cause CSS is for people who can see, oh. I'll get to work (I'll get to work). I'm master of HTML, Making fancily-designed pages. Many years ago, I got the hang of it. It works well. Clicking and typing, And reading and writing, And listening and doing my work, work, work, work. SD's and CF's, And flash drives and Bluetooth, And WiFi cards made by Sandisk. One line of eight-dot Braille cells, In a contraption made by HumanWare (HumanWare). There is a touch cursor key For every cell in the Braille display. (In the Braille display) Above the touch cursor buttons Is the keyboard you use to navigate (navigate). There is a very small pin For every dot in the Braille display. Woohoo-woo, Keep reading. (Keep reading). (I'm still reading). I use Websites To do Research. The Net Has many websites. So I Can do all things. (instrumental) One line of eight-dot Braille cells, In a contraption made by HumanWare. There is a touch cursor key For every cell in the Braille display. Above the touch cursor buttons Is the keyboard you use to navigate. There is a very small pin For every dot in the Braille display. (In the Braille display). Keep reading. (Keep reading). Keep reading. (Keep reading). Keep reading. Oh, Keep, (click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click)

Audio

Even though there is no audio recording of this comedy bit on the Digital Demo Tape, I had performed this song at BrailleBeats Talent Night 2011 (on June 23). They recorded it, put it on their own website (and their own album) in high-quality MP3 format. And it was recorded live! It actually sounds like a comedy show, instead of a studio tape, like the ones on the DDT. Pretty soon, a DDT version of this song will be available.

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